A Waste of Time

Let me preface this with a few words: I'm doing this stupid post for myself mostly...just because I have some sort of complex that prevents me from stopping myself from doing something I dare myself to do. (Does that even make sense...?)

So this holiday season I was lucky enough to get a GREAT gift from a good friend from home (thanks, Alex) and at the bottom of this bag of goodies was the best part: a layer of chocolates. Dove chocolates to be precise.

I had a few at home, and to my surprise, each delicious chocolate came with a wise drop of wisdom, sweetly delivered to me on the foil from who else but Ms. Martha Stewart. Well in the moment I found each of these wildly hysterical, not sure why (but one can assume sleep deprivation and the giddiness of the last night home) and I declared to Rachel: I'm going to save ALL OF THESE. And then I'm going to tell everyone about them!

Well naturally this sounded like a very stupid idea, and naturally Rachel said something along the lines of "I'm sure you will..."

Well the disbelief I sensed in her tone was enough of a dare for me. I essentially dared myself to show everyone how hilarious these "Martha-isms" (as I now fondly refer to them as) are!

As time went on, I saved every foil wrapper, and found only 7 duplicates. I decided for my sanity (and for the sake of space) I would at least throw away the doubles, but I managed to save every one of these foil wrappers in my room with the sincerest intention of putting these up online, just to prove I would do it.

I no longer find these funny. I no longer think anyone will care if I post these stupid little ideas for a good holiday. I kind of wish I didn't dare myself to do it. I think this is a classic example of a hidea.

Without further ado, I give you my collected Martha-isms...

Use cookie cutters as tree ornaments.
Go to a farmers market or nursery for the freshest greenery.
Turn to a tried-and-true recipe for an important get together.
A simmering pot of stew will warm up any occasion.
Display seasonal fruit for an unexpected holiday centerpiece
Wrap holiday gifts immediately after you purchase them.
Use cloves and allspice to create a seasonal fragrance.
Try rickrack or twine in place of ribbon.
Place candles on a mirror in the center of your holiday table.
Try a cheese course as an alternative to dessert.
Make a centerpiece of pomegranates, seckel pears, and grapes.
Ornaments add unexpected sparkle to the table.
Tie a sprig of holly to the bedpost in your guest room.

So that's it. I'm glad I'm finally finished this stupid self-dare and I can continue on with my life, foil-wrapper free.

To file a complaint about my wasting of your precious time, please leave a message.